Let’s see things from a different perspective. Boundaries, as you already know, is not just about learning to say “No”. It is a complete skill set that you need to master before entering a new relationship or job or setting up a business or even resetting current relationships.
This is my step-by-step framework that has been proven to make you stand your ground and NOT ALLOW anyone to dim YOUR light!
Remember this: if you learn how to predict reactions, how to read others, and how to harness your self-worth, the consequences you might be so afraid of will have a hard time affecting you. Until one day, these -not so pleasant at times - consequences will hurt no more and will not longer have a negative impact on you.
There is now a framework to help you ignore the other voices and find your own voice. This framework will guide you towards developing a set of principles that you will stand by.
No more anxiety about what others will think and say. No more frustration for not speaking up when you should. No more losing jobs or opportunities by not being bold and strong.
Don’t Let them Dim Your Light
So many thoughts happen in your head when you feel that your boundaries have been overstepped. Sadness, embarrassment, anger…All happen after THAT moment when you know you should have stepped up.
This is YOUR blueprint.
This is where you learn the exact tools and techniques that are suitable for you, and only you. This is where coaching matters.
Too much forgiveness. Too much accommodating others. Too much putting yourself in the back seat.
Timing is everything in life. There is a time when you should be kind, accommodating and taking the back seat. One of the core skills you will learn is TIMING.
You don’t have to change yourself or your values. You just need to balance all out with the right timing and strength.
There is no easy answer to this one without feeling hurt. And there is not just one, or two or three reasons that if you tackled, you would be able to establish your boundaries. What research has shown, though, is that in general, you know it when you have missed the chance to draw the line.
You might dislike conflict - it is terrible when you have to look at the other person and engage in an argument. Isn’t there a way around it? There is, thankfully.
You might not have practised in having difficult conversations. These conversations can drain you and make you feel depleted for the rest of the day.
Feeling not worthy does not do you good - is it a matter of confidence? No, it is a matter of self-respect. You have to fight for that respect, hard as it may sound.
Is it external validation that you are looking for? This may have turned you into a people pleaser.
Are you too kind and generous? For whatever reason you do this, good and honourable values, if not practised based on the “golden mean”, can lead to using them in excess, which is unhealthy.
Do you feel you do not belong to an aggressive and unfriendly society? Do you feel it falling heavy on your shoulders? Peer pressure and cultural norms can damage your role, position and personal limits.
Are you feeling emotionally exhausted from blurred work-life boundaries? This is probably because you have set those boundaries the wrong way.
At the end of the day, you decide to change things. And you follow some tips and strategies, only to realise that a lot more is required to make things happen for you.
This is your invitation
With more than 30 years’ experience in teaching and a full 15 years in coaching individuals and groups, I have seen it all when it comes to the difficulty in drawing the line. Making your personal limits clear is quite hard, yet doable. I have “extracted” all the skills you need to work on to become a clear communicator, a strong personality, a respected individual who does not feel guilty when you do something and feel the need to apologise.
It is time to negotiate your life on your terms. And I will stand right beside you while you are doing that! Are you ready to join me?
Over the years, I collected “evidence”. What works and what doesn’t when it comes to establishing your boundaries. This programme guides you through everything and you also benefit from live coaching calls.
You are invited to participate in the group coaching programme after you get to know me and trust my work. I use a state-of-the-art e-learning platform which hosts all course materials. These include short videos, e-books and tasks for you to work on the subjects we analyse in the calls. This helps you become better at establishing personal limits and much faster than normal.
Coaching calls are held on specific dates and times and are recorded. The recordings are uploaded on the platform which has private access.
Before you learn to act on anything, you need to explore and understand how you operate. The next step will be to establish what competencies are missing so you can start building them in the next module.
This is not a theoretical part. In fact, it is as practical as the other two. I will teach you how to discover the level of respect you should have for yourself, the extent to which you usually serve others and when it is time to stop doing this, if and how you blame yourself or feel guilty and, finally, the language you use that keeps you locked in ugly situations. I will coach you on how to become more aware of your reactions, your needs, your current communication style and negotiation skills. I will work with you on your levels of perception and core skills such as seeing different perspectives, making decisions and using critical thinking.
This module ensures that you learn as many tools as possible - but not just any tools. I help you learn those that suit your personality and specific character traits. Not all techniques are for everyone. And this is the beauty of this programme. Everything you learn is something that you could apply without feeling awkard or uncomfortable. Make no mistake: you will need to get uncomfortable, but not when it comes to choosing your tools.
I will teach you the skills required to become stronger. To feel more confident. I will work on your self-worth and self-esteem. These skills include negotiation tactics, reading others, discovering the golden mean, judging when to act, developing a good sense of timing in difficult situations and learning the right language to handle difficult conversations.
Now that you have understood how you operate and what stops you from drawing the line and you have developed your primary skills to set boundaries, it is time to put those tools in action. In this module I work with you on creating your personal playbook. This playbook is your strategy for change and implementation.
During this step, I will ask you to test some tools out and return with your reflections and outcomes. I will help you tweak and refine your style until you are satisfied with the results. Slowly, you will feel you are becoming stronger and more capable of handling situations you previously thought were hard and drenching. I will walk you through mock situations and help you have conversations with conviction. You will learn to stand your ground with confidence without allowing anyone to dim your light.
This programme is NOT an online course where you get to study on your own. This is a LIVE coaching programme that ALSO includes a self-study feature!
Fifteen years of coaching experience and thirty years of teaching and training have helped craft this programme which is based on research and scientific findings when it comes to personalities and behavioural change.
My journey started off as a teacher of English to children, then I taught business English to adults in corporations, and then I entered the world of coaching. It was not the work with my coaching clients nor the work I did with entrepreneurs at the start-up initiative of the Dutch Embassy in Athens that inspired this programme.
Boundaries is what I have always been fighting for. Before the incident and even more so after. It is the most important skill one needs to learn to be able to live a free and worthy life.
So, when I say “don’t let them dim your light”, I know exactly what I am talking about. And I have trained extensively to be able to coach you on this.
Building your self-worth and confidence along with your priming skills is my promise to you. It is a long journey to learn how to set boundaries.
So, if the live sessions or the course material are not a good fit for you, just email me and I will give you all your money back.
Just make sure you do not miss the 14-day window.
This 100% money back guarantee is not easily offered in our industry. However, I am confident that you will see and feel the value of this specific group coaching programme with me and enjoy it as much as past participants have.
The classes are 90 minutes long and will be held either on Tuesdays or on Thursdays at 12 pm PT/ 3 pm ET (NY time)/ 8 pm London time/ 7 pm GMT / 11 PM Dubai time. The specific dates and times will be listed as soon as the programme opens up for registrations. If you’re unable to attend live, a replay will be available by the end of the day. However, you will be sent an additional video summary by me and will be expecting a VIDEO REPLY FROM YOU AS PART OF THE COMPLETE PERSONAL COACHING EXPERIENCE.
You’ll receive a comprehensive roadmap with your registration. You will need approximately 3-4 hours per week including the live calls to start seeing results real soon.
You will also retain lifetime access to all group & course materials (including replays of the live calls) so you can work at your own pace if you wish to revisit some gems and tasks - especially if new challenges arise.
Other coaching programmes may tell you what to do and provide a high level overview of how to do it.
The Boundaries Blueprint has a specific pedagogical and training structure that expertly guides you to results.
TBB also tells you exactly what to do in weekly LIVE classes with me
TBB tells you precisely .HOW to do it with detailed, personalised coaching sessions.
TBB gives you real life examples and a complete playbook with tasks to improve more Life Navigation Skills (so you can say goodbye to vexing challenges).
This group coaching programme is ideal for women and men determined to take back control and learn how to create an alliance with themselves while advocating for their beliefs. It is a hands-on coaching programme that pushes you to finally do the work.
If you want to catch a glimpse of how I work on setting boundaries, then download the free resource: How to Create Boundaries and Stick to Them
In this FREE e-book you will get the blockers and solutions to set boundaries. The ideal mindset is presented along with practical tasks for you test out.
Yes! You will retain access to all of the live recordings in the state-of-the-art e-learning Academy I have designed so that you can revisit and re-watch at any time!
Reach out to me:
Send me an email at info@pamelacaravas.com with any questions.
Send me a DM on Instagram and I will get back to you the soonest possible.
